#9734597, By MoFo No sex please, we're British!

  • MoFo 22 Jul 2013 13:06:42 282 posts
    Seen 3 years ago
    Registered 15 years ago
    Phones up broadband supplier to unblock porn

    Customer Service: So you want to unblock your porn?
    Me: Yes
    CS: Let me just pass you to the dept that deals with this...
    Porn Dept: Hello sir, this is the CIA/MI5 help desk....erm I mean your broadband supplier. We've added your details to our secret database...erm I mean your request is being processed. While you wait could you tell me, are you a paedophile?
    Me: What?
    Porn Dept: I think it's best we take that as a 'yes'. Please just hold the line, we'll have someone come around to your house very shortly to arrest...err I mean re-enable your porn access.
    Me: Wait, is the government storing this request in some secret file about me?
    PD: Haha no of course not. We and Mr Cameron will always swear that we'd never do anything like that. Of course my saying that is all you need to trust us.

    (Sound of cars pulling up outside, sirens blaring)

    Me: You lying fuckers!
    PD: It's your fault Sir. Everyone knows that if you look at naked pictures of women you must be a latent paedophile/rapist. We're just protecting society from you.
    Me: But I just want a wank... (sounds of a scuffle followed by loud shouting and finally several volleys of gunfire)
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