Following Cancer Page 68

  • Jono62 7 Dec 2017 17:12:09 19,822 posts
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    Great news Boo.

    Hope all goes ok with your nan milkybarkid.
  • boo 7 Dec 2017 18:42:47 13,448 posts
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    Thanks all. And to just be clear, my backside remains unviolated. They cut six holes in your stomach and go in that way.

    Fingers crossed milkybarkid.
  • drhcnip 7 Dec 2017 19:46:13 5,995 posts
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    that's fab news, squire! delighted to hear it...
  • the_milkybar_kid 7 Dec 2017 20:35:35 6,869 posts
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    @ZuluHero thanks man. Kicked the shit out of me yesterday to be honest, just broke down crying a few times. It's a weird feeling, I feel completely suckerpunched by it but sort of feel guilty because I know what her husband and daughters (my Mum and Auntie) will be feeling will be amplified a dozen. I just hope the steroids work in time and she's well enough to.give this fucking horrible disease another kick up it's ugly cunt.

    Thanks for all the kind words guys. And again boo, really happy everything has gone well for you, well in that man.
  • the_milkybar_kid 14 Dec 2017 10:01:20 6,869 posts
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    Nan passed away last night. Put up a strong fight but passed in her sleep last night in her bed with my Auntie. Only just spoke to Mum as she didn't want to call in the night and I don't take mobile to the gym. Just glad I managed to tell her we all loved her one last time. I'm absolutely gutwrenched for my Grandad. 64 years of Marriage.
  • LittleSparra 14 Dec 2017 10:06:41 7,926 posts
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    64 years. Jesus. I cannot imagine his feelings now. :(
  • boo 14 Dec 2017 10:08:13 13,448 posts
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    I'm so sorry mate. 64 years of marriage - that's an amazing achievement. I bet you have some fabulous memories.
    I was ok when I lost my Nan, right up until the funeral, when I cried like a baby. It helped, so don't feel you have to put on a brave face.

    All the best to you and your family.
  • Frogofdoom 14 Dec 2017 10:11:01 7,897 posts
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    Sorry to hear that milky :(
  • the_milkybar_kid 14 Dec 2017 10:15:41 6,869 posts
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    Thanks guys. It definitely is an achievement, I can only hope that I'm as happy as they were if / when we get to that age. Never saw them argue or bicker.

    Don't want to make this about me, just feel weirdly numb. Don't know whether to stay at work or go see the family. If I went to see Grandad I don't know if I could hold it together and he doesn't need that.


    Edited by the_milkybar_kid at 10:40:32 14-12-2017
  • Frogofdoom 14 Dec 2017 10:45:46 7,897 posts
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    Some people handle things better staying busy but if it were me I wouldn't be working. Take some time out and let your head settle would be my way.
  • JamboWayOh 14 Dec 2017 11:51:42 6,754 posts
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    Sorry to hear Milky and my condolences to your grandad. 64 years of marriage is something else.
  • Deleted user 14 December 2017 11:56:52
    Sorry to hear that milky. I'm glad she had what sounds like a lovely life before it and I hope that gives your grandad comfort.
  • the_milkybar_kid 14 Dec 2017 12:14:06 6,869 posts
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    Thanks for the kind words lads, means a great deal. She was an such lovely lady with only good in her heart. This is the sort of thing I'll always remember

    Edited by the_milkybar_kid at 12:19:30 14-12-2017
  • the_milkybar_kid 15 Dec 2017 20:52:07 6,869 posts
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    Sorry to bring this thread up. Just needed a minute to vent.

    Had today off work just to try and collect my thoughts and pluck up the courage to visit my Granddad, Mum and Auntie, who's been staying at Nan and Granddads for the last week or so. Seeing the strongest man I've known, and knowing the hardships he's endured through his life- sob and struggle to understand how this fucking disease has taken the woman that only ever had good in her heart, the women he's loved and married for 65 (not 64) years is absolutely fucking heartbreaking. He was saying he was fully expecting their lives to come to a natural close in the next few years, they're both in their early 80's. But to see her ravaged and become so ill from fucking cancer this last year and to really struggle in her last day has bought him to his knees.

    Over a decade ago my other Grandad died of a broken heart a year after my Nan died. They were also married for well over 50 years. I just hope with our son, our unborn son and my cousin's twins that are due it'll give him more reason to carry on. He knows all of us are there for him, love and support him. But it can't replace the hole Nan's departure has left.

    Please don't mistake this for a fishing for sympathy post, I really just needed somewhere to get it out. It's so fucking sad.

    Edited by the_milkybar_kid at 20:52:26 15-12-2017
  • DUFFMAN5 15 Dec 2017 21:07:20 22,817 posts
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    It is good to be able to vent mate.
    All the best and strength to you and yours.
  • pk1980 15 Dec 2017 22:07:03 1,034 posts
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    @the_milkybar_kid don't feel you can't vent here. This for me was a great place to do it and it does help. Just need somewhere to get it out.

    I'm sorry to hear of your loss. Best wishes to you and your family at this time.
  • Rusty_M 15 Dec 2017 22:17:51 6,830 posts
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    Say whatever you need to say. It's never easy for anyone.
  • ZuluHero 15 Dec 2017 22:35:38 6,362 posts
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    I'm sorry I missed your post a few days ago saying about your nan, she sounded like an awesome person and 65 years of marriage is an amazing milestone.

    It doesn't matter how many posts or updates you give, all that matters is if it helps you. I really hope you are holding up OK. All the best!
  • boo 15 Dec 2017 22:36:46 13,448 posts
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    Vent mate.

    Do not go gentle into that good night,
    Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
  • JonFE 15 Dec 2017 23:39:08 1,796 posts
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    Sorry to hear about your loss milky, my condolences.

    It's never easy to cope with the loss of a loved one, so, as others have said, vent away; after all, that's what this thread is about.
  • the_milkybar_kid 15 Dec 2017 23:44:21 6,869 posts
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    Thanks for the kind words guys. Means a great deal, truly.
  • oakie007 21 Dec 2017 22:33:47 263 posts
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    Itís taken me a long time to find the right time to post this. My dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in November 2013, along with asbestosis. A bit confusing at the time, was this the trigger of the cancer or was it just bad luck.

    Well heís done amazing, heís 78, he was strong at my wedding last year which meant everything to me, but this year, shortly after April his consultant broke the news that the cancer was beyond control. Heís currently in a local hospice, comfortable, but a shadow of his former self. Itís heartbreaking to see him like this. His body grows weaker every day, but his spirit is as strong as ever.

    Dealing with cancer has put things in my life in perspective, life is precious, short and you need to crack on and make the most of it. The hospice staff are beyond amazing. Iíll be spending Christmas Day at the hospice having a Christmas dinner with my dad, itís going to be his last, and the most important Christmas of my life.

    Have a great Xmas everybody, donít take it for granted, put any anger, or gripes that you have to the side, and live live live.

    By the way his name is Bernard, so please raise a glass to him when you are on the lash this Xmas/New Years eve.
  • UncleLou Moderator 21 Dec 2017 22:44:36 39,451 posts
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    @oakie007 Don't know what to say, just that I read this. Take care.
  • jamievilla 21 Dec 2017 22:52:51 846 posts
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    @oakie007 Same as Lou, it's difficult to know what to say. Sending you best wishes and hope you have a great Xmas. Will definitely raise a beer to Bernard for you.

    All the best everyone, this thread is an odd mix of heartbreaking and heartwarming. Hate to see it bumped but the kind thoughts are very humbling to read.
  • Deleted user 21 December 2017 22:55:43
    Hope you both have a wonderful Christmas oakie.

    I helped my dad lift something today when he came round as he's starting to look frail. Always was a hell of a powerful guy, but not any more, so your post resonated, especially as they're the same age.
  • Dougs 21 Dec 2017 23:24:56 85,475 posts
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    UncleLou wrote:
    @oakie007 Don't know what to say, just that I read this. Take care.
    Yeah, this. Been there and it does get easier, honest. All the best to you and the family.
  • ZuluHero 21 Dec 2017 23:40:16 6,362 posts
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    @oakie007 sorry to hear that, he sounds like a great guy. My own father died 14 years ago when I was only 23, I'd give anything to have one more Christmas with him. I'm just glad we Ieft nothing unsaid between us, so I hope that's the same for you guys.

    I'm too old now to be out on the lash, but I'll have a quiet reflection on them both with a nice glass of port by the fire.

    Try and make the best of it and I hope you are doing OK as well. it's a difficult time but I do hope you you both still manage to have a happy Christmas together. All the best fella.
  • Dougs 21 Dec 2017 23:44:27 85,475 posts
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    I shall do the same ZuluHero. :(
  • Khanivor 21 Dec 2017 23:59:37 43,756 posts
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    @oakie007 - you are both fortunate that you get to spend this time together. Life is short and cruel and far too many people don't get to spend time with their parents before they go.

    Other than to express my sympathy, I cannot add anything other than to wish you both a Merry Christmas.
  • the_milkybar_kid 22 Dec 2017 07:14:49 6,869 posts
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    @oakie007 as difficult as it must be, don't forget the happy memories you had together. I hope you both have awonderful Christmas together. All the best to you and you Dad.
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