| You work in a hospital? Damn, you have NO excuse not to get stabby. Butter theft pay and conditions... Seriously, no-one would blame you |
Stealing from communal work fridge • Page 3
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Jonsend 823 posts
Seen 12 hours ago
Registered 18 years agoCould you get a jar of something weird looking from a polish supermarket, empty it out and clean it and put your butter in there? -
smoothpete 37,743 posts
Seen 4 days ago
Registered 17 years agoAt my last office we had a new Director join, and people kept stealing his Alpen. He sent an email to the entire European workforce complaining about it, that would have been about 5,000 people or so. Dumbass. The responses were funny, particularly the swiss you stated their national pride in having invented Alpen, confirmed that they were not responsible for the thefts, and wished him well in his efforts to catch the culprit -
chopsen 21,958 posts
Seen 14 hours ago
Registered 16 years agoIf you work in hospital, I think you're fucked. My experience of working in hospitals was that people will just nick/eat anything they find, and so many people come and go I doubt it's just one person.
However, as you *do* work in a hospital, I guess it would be easy to source something you could add to the butter to make the thief regret eating it..... -
sport 17,064 posts
Seen 6 days ago
Registered 16 years agoHas the art of making a sandwich at home and taking it to work been lost through the ages? -
Really think you should smother yourself in the butter first if you're going to follow Deckard's advice. -
QueenofSpain 433 posts
Seen 9 years ago
Registered 16 years agosport wrote:
Has the art of making a sandwich at home and taking it to work been lost through the ages?
You can't make toast at home ready though can you.gif)
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Whatsfor 2,187 posts
Seen 7 years ago
Registered 14 years agoVice.Destroyer wrote:
elstoof wrote:
Attach a photo of you with your cock in the butter to the tub.
Or put all your stuff in a carrier bag and tie it up.
I'll skip the first part of your advice. And I am already doing the second part of your advice. The bitches just tear through it. Like the criminal, thieving bitches that they are. Then they have the audacity to tie the bag up again. Presumably that nobody else steals what has now become our (thief and victim) butter.
My missus once used the "knot-in-bag" technique at her work to conceal her two enchiladas. She went in at lunch time and one of the enchiladas had been scoffed and the knot retied! Bastard... -
smoothpete 37,743 posts
Seen 4 days ago
Registered 17 years agoI want enchiladas for lunch! Fuck, I'd steal the whole bag if they were in our fridge here. Tell her to take a less delicious lunch in. She's only got herself to blame. -
matt6666 2,620 posts
Seen 10 years ago
Registered 13 years agoThey eat toast in Spain? Thought it was tapas and San miguel.. -
mwtb 2,381 posts
Seen 8 years ago
Registered 17 years agoI want to know who takes bread to work with the full intention of hunting down some butter? Then again, even if people stated up front that there was "communal butter" I wouldn't use it. I've seen some pretty horrifying hygiene habits in shared kitchens in my time. -
Whatsfor 2,187 posts
Seen 7 years ago
Registered 14 years agoAlso a solution for Vice.Destroyer;
1) Buy some Avery stickers.
2) Write "Medicated Laxative Butter" on the sticker.
3) Place the sticker on the lid of the butter.
4) Boom, problem solved!
Edit:
If sticker doesn't work, add laxatives. -
matt6666 2,620 posts
Seen 10 years ago
Registered 13 years agoBull fighting victims getting sub standard care because of this situ -
smoothpete 37,743 posts
Seen 4 days ago
Registered 17 years agoAt WorldCom before they went tits up, some disgruntled employee pissed in various food containers in the fridge of their kitchenette, then did a shit in the dishwasher. So I'm told anyway. -
billythekid 12,595 posts
Seen 1 day ago
Registered 16 years agoNot going to help with your butter dilemma but these look good for sarnies:
http://bizlinks.wordpress.com/2008/10/11/●the-fridge-work-no-more-stolen-lunches-by-the-bastards-at-last-someone-has-come-up-with-a-solution/ -
mrpon 37,367 posts
Seen 9 hours ago
Registered 15 years ago -
Load_2.0 33,582 posts
Seen 13 hours ago
Registered 18 years agoWhatsfor wrote:
Vice.Destroyer wrote:
elstoof wrote:
Attach a photo of you with your cock in the butter to the tub.
Or put all your stuff in a carrier bag and tie it up.
I'll skip the first part of your advice. And I am already doing the second part of your advice. The bitches just tear through it. Like the criminal, thieving bitches that they are. Then they have the audacity to tie the bag up again. Presumably that nobody else steals what has now become our (thief and victim) butter.
My missus once used the "knot-in-bag" technique at her work to conceal her two enchiladas. She went in at lunch time and one of the enchiladas had been scoffed and the knot retied! Bastard...
Now this is reason for rage. That is so fucking out of order, eating someones sandwich? Jesus I could understand it if you were working with tramps and the homeless but in an office environment! Thats a slap in the face.
Butter on the other hand... meh. -
Whatsfor 2,187 posts
Seen 7 years ago
Registered 14 years agosmoothpete wrote:
At WorldCom before they went tits up, some disgruntled employee pissed in various food containers in the fridge of their kitchenette, then did a shit in the dishwasher. So I'm told anyway.
/stealth disgruntled employee post -
matt6666 2,620 posts
Seen 10 years ago
Registered 13 years agoHeh, yeah.. 'some' -
Not sure how this would work with butter, but I know someone who laced her milk with a heavy dose of laxatives because she was pissed off with going to the fridge and finding the bottle empty (literally, the fucker would merrily take the last drop). The culprit was quickly identified. -
Just get loads of bits of toast in there so it looks like shit. -
heyyo 14,356 posts
Seen 4 years ago
Registered 16 years agoA cunt of an colleague really gave me a tough time in my last job, snide comments about my work and my life, and he openly admitted to eating my lunches etc Told the bosses blahblah, but I got another better paid job so I was out of there.
In my last week I threw his food in the bin every day, emptied his drinks in the sink and once opened a pack of his crisps and ate them in front of his face, that felt good. My last day, I took a syringe full of milk (not an euphemism!) and injected his sandwiches and his banana which for some stupid reason he kept in the fridge. FTW! -
LOL nice work .gif)
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Alastair 24,828 posts
Seen 48 minutes ago
Registered 20 years agoHe sounds like a tosser - what did you do to upset him in the first place? -
mrpon 37,367 posts
Seen 9 hours ago
Registered 15 years agoHow on earth, do you inject a sandwich with milk?! -
Load_2.0 33,582 posts
Seen 13 hours ago
Registered 18 years agoPut some plastic (NON TOXIC) items in the butter.
Small childrens toys would be a winner, toy bugs, jewels or action figures.
That should be enough to put off the thieves.
Maybe a small note saying "Stop taking my butter, I know it's you"
Or an exploding dye pack, a miniturised cctv camera and a low current alarm bell. -
heyyo! wrote:
A cunt of an colleague really gave me a tough time in my last job, snide comments about my work and my life, and he openly admitted to eating my lunches etc Told the bosses blahblah, but I got another better paid job so I was out of there.
In my last week I threw his food in the bin every day, emptied his drinks in the sink and once opened a pack of his crisps and ate them in front of his face, that felt good. My last day, I took a syringe full of milk (not an euphemism!) and injected his sandwiches and his banana which for some stupid reason he kept in the fridge. FTW!
See, you frighten me hayyo..!
And the fact you live so close, just gives me the willies. /o\
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