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Whenever Sharz starts talking about someone he's slept with, something in me always wants to ask "Was she conscious at the time?" Something something spreading her sheets something. |
Match.com and Online Dating v2 • Page 577
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Rivuzu 18,424 posts
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Registered 15 years ago -
quadfather 39,069 posts
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Registered 11 years agoIt's all gone wrong again -
Tryhard 12,014 posts
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Registered 11 years agoBetween the sheets. -
challenge_hanukkah 14,394 posts
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Registered 8 years agoSharz has finally worked out those early compatibility problems.
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quadfather 39,069 posts
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Registered 11 years agoIs that wd-40? -
challenge_hanukkah 14,394 posts
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Registered 8 years ago
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elstoof 28,125 posts
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Registered 16 years agoRecycled cotton sheets -
Tryhard 12,014 posts
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Registered 11 years agoWD-40 helps you slip in more smoothly. Like K-Y jelly for robots. -
Tomo 19,565 posts
Seen 4 hours ago
Registered 18 years agoLoad_2.0 wrote:
Beat me to it!
Sharz wrote:
For posterity.
her concerns and life issues were totally different to mine.
Where I was thinking about recycling and bills she was thinking about which of her friends was falling out with who.
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All_Good 228 posts
Seen 4 years ago
Registered 8 years agoSome of you don't happen to get yourself in a pickle, cut loose and ditch the 19 year old, it seems like it's the tip of the iceberg. This is the sort of shit that happens when you are in high school, life is giving you a massive hint... Chopsuey... -
twelveways 7,131 posts
Seen 2 years ago
Registered 15 years agoelstoof wrote:
Me too, I just need to find one
I'm THIS close to considering dating a 25 year old guys, don't judge me -
ecosse wrote:
The best thing about 25 year olds is that there's 20 of them -
Rivuzu 18,424 posts
Seen 2 days ago
Registered 15 years ago/Jimmy Carr laughtrack -
Reminds me of when I proposed to my wife.
"What are you thinking about, darling?"
"Recycling."
"Me too."
"Marry me." -
Decks 31,013 posts
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Registered 6 years agoThe moment I saw you sorting your plastics and non-plastics I knew I just had to have you right there and then. -
elstoof 28,125 posts
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Registered 16 years agoWe made tender love right there on top of the empty baked beans tins, our passion meant there wasn't time to rinse them. Bean juice was splashing everywhere, I hadn't felt that much like Mickey Rourke since we bought the chihuahua. -
challenge_hanukkah 14,394 posts
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Registered 8 years agoBeaming that I didn't bottle buggering you behind the bottle bank. -
neilka 24,021 posts
Seen 2 minutes ago
Registered 16 years agoelstoof wrote:
We made tender love right there on top of the empty baked beans tins, our passion meant there wasn't time to rinse them. Bean juice was splashing everywhere, I hadn't felt that much like Mickey Rourke since we bought the chihuahua.
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I knew my marriage was going downhill when she forgot to put out the red bin on recycling day. -
Gremmoo wrote:
You should attempt the, uhh, brown bin on the days the red bin is out?
I knew my marriage was going downhill when she forgot to put out the red bin on recycling day. -
It was a cold night, and our hands touched briefly as we both tried to place a green bottle into the correct bin. She was warm, the sort of warmth that touches your soul. As the empty bottle of Sauvignon Blanc reflected the moonlight in her eyes I knew that this exact moment was the most important in my life. We kissed briefly, but she had to leave because someone had dropped a can of Stella in a normal bin. I never saw her again. -
ForegoneReality 4 posts
Seen 2 years ago
Registered 10 years agoHmm...I'm tempted to go back into the online dating game. It's hard on the old ego when 90% of your messages go ignored though.
Anyone have any tips for talking to the laydeez? I'm sure the whole 'telling them I'm big into Final Fantasy' will make them swoon?
Edited by ForegoneReality at 22:18:28 17-06-2016 -
challenge_hanukkah 14,394 posts
Seen 3 hours ago
Registered 8 years agoDukeSilver wrote:
Have you thought about submitting this to Mills & Boon?
It was a cold night, and our hands touched briefly as we both tried to place a green bottle into the correct bin. She was warm, the sort of warmth that touches your soul. As the empty bottle of Sauvignon Blanc reflected the moonlight in her eyes I knew that this exact moment was the most important in my life. We kissed briefly, but she had to leave because someone had dropped a can of Stella in a normal bin. I never saw her again.
Edited by challenge_hanukkah at 22:30:22 17-06-2016 -
ForegoneReality wrote:
have you tried the Konami code on Tinder to try to skip levels
Hmm...I'm tempted to go back into the online dating game. It's hard on the old ego when 90% of your messages go ignored though.
Anyone have any tips for talking to the laydeez? I'm sure the whole 'telling them I'm big into Final Fantasy' will make them swoon? -
Dougs 100,414 posts
Seen 18 hours ago
Registered 18 years agoUp, up, down, down, left, right, left, right,start. -
Decks 31,013 posts
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Registered 6 years agoYou do that on a ladies clitoris and she shits the bed. Least that's what shaz told be and he's the maddest shagger south of Leicester. -
Not on my reclaimed cotton sheets Maureen! -
retro74 3,798 posts
Seen 22 hours ago
Registered 13 years agoForegoneReality wrote:
Have you not been paying attention to the advice? Start with "do you recycle?"
Hmm...I'm tempted to go back into the online dating game. It's hard on the old ego when 90% of your messages go ignored though.
Anyone have any tips for talking to the laydeez? I'm sure the whole 'telling them I'm big into Final Fantasy' will make them swoon?
Then enjoy your post coital cigarette -
Tryhard 12,014 posts
Seen 4 years ago
Registered 11 years agoHe maybe on to something though.
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Not sure if my waste wants to be recycled, it mustn't be very hygienic. I'd surely rather knock up a fresh batch.
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