| When I was dating my now-wife we were at my Aunty's house and by chance the TV was on BBC 4 with the show Only Connect with Victoria Coren. For those that don't know it's an insanely difficult fill in the gap gameshow with really clever teams. This particular game there were 3 dates and you had to guess the fourth. I looked at the dates and immediately thought I'd seen a connection and blurted out an answer. My girlfriend looked at me frowning, the team who's turn it was to answer couldn't get the answer, they were a team of professors in statistics, the shows host revealed the answer which was the same as mine. She then proceeded to explain the answer which was hideously complex and my horribly simplistic reasoning by an astonishing coincidence happened to be the right answer. My gf stared at me in awe as I kept my composure, said we needed to go and then swaggered off like I'd just defeated Dr No with one hand tied behind my back. |
James Bond moments
-
-
neilka 24,025 posts
Seen 56 minutes ago
Registered 16 years agomuttler wrote:
Also got attacked by someone with a carving knife, he slashed my outside left forearm pretty good 3 or 4 times, before I managed to grab an aluminium bread bin lid and used it as a shield, trapped the knife against his chest by punching forward with the lid (in my left hand) as he was lunging at me, momentarily the knife was pressed against his chest by the lid, and sent my right fist over the top into his face, he fell back against a work top, I dropped the bin lid and grabbed hold of his forearm with both hands, raised his hand up and then slammed his hand down against the formica work top as hard as I could I think 3 times and he dropped the knife. I then brought my right fist back, adrenalin was in full flow by then, I was going to hammer the shit out of him till he went down, but no need, he puts his hands over his head and laid down on the floor in front of me whimpering. I just kicked the knife away from him and walked away. He didn't follow. He cut me fairly deep on my left forearm, frenzied slashing, it was quite a wake up call. -
minky-kong 14,787 posts
Seen 5 hours ago
Registered 13 years agoI think the reason Timothy Dalton is often derided as a bad Bond is that he never got the answer on a TV quiz show right in either of his two films. -
He also never had a bread bin -
@malloc I also answered two questions in that show before the teams' answers. They must have dummed it down for that show as I usually answer naff all. There was one on chess the other day that was pretty straightforward and yet I didn't see it despite writing chess moves every week. -
minky-kong 14,787 posts
Seen 5 hours ago
Registered 13 years agoBond: You exschpect me to talk?
Goldfinger: No Mr Bond! I expect you to get a Pointless answer! -
Khanivor 44,800 posts
Seen 6 days ago
Registered 20 years agoWell, there was me walking home form my last day at work, goodbye cards stuffed into my jacket pocket, and polly bag filled with detritus from my desk. Walking up a long straight road to the main street, I see this ned, decked out all in white, pedalling like mad with this Asian fella running after him. At first I thought it was two mates pissing about as the ned was grinning, but then the other fella started waving his arms and shouting 'he’s knicking my bike'
So I stand in the middle of the road with my arms stretched out. The ned hunches over and peddles right for me. 'Fuck you' I thought and stood my ground, a thought about what I was doing still not getting anywhere near entering my head. The little cunt swerves at the last moment, exposing a nice piece of sleeve to grab a hold off. Out goes hand, down goes ned with a satisfying heavy tumble. He's about a good 15-20 ft away from me once he stops skidding along the ground, expressing his fond admiration for my actions. He then throws the heavy chain he's also knicked at me, striking my side. The Asian guy has caught up with me, and realising that he's just thrown away a very heavy and deadly weapon to his foe, the wee cunt legs it.
The dude was well chuffed, both of us shaking, exchanging phone numbers. We part after bemoaning the state of the world, both shook up and both relieved that nothing was hurt.
I just had to write this down, trying to get my nerves back in order. And I'm feeling quite pleased with myself for doing the right thing.
MUTHAFUKIN NEDS FUCK WIT ME AN ILL RIP YOU A NEW ONE!!! -
STOP GETTING BOND WRONG -
richarddavies 8,312 posts
Seen 4 hours ago
Registered 13 years agowell i don't think your gonna find many examples of people vag bashing an international supervillains hussy , shooting the fella in the face, then quippin about it. Well i haven't done that much lately. -
freddymercurystwin 2,825 posts
Seen 2 days ago
Registered 17 years agoHmmm Victoria Coren Mitchell
/drifts off ..... -
Khanivor wrote:
That's flippin brilliant. I know some people are against the idea of anyone intervening, I don't like that idea and you totally did the right thing. Bravo sir.
Well, there was me walking home form my last day at work, goodbye cards stuffed into my jacket pocket, and polly bag filled with detritus from my desk. Walking up a long straight road to the main street, I see this ned, decked out all in white, pedalling like mad with this Asian fella running after him. At first I thought it was two mates pissing about as the ned was grinning, but then the other fella started waving his arms and shouting 'he’s knicking my bike'
So I stand in the middle of the road with my arms stretched out. The ned hunches over and peddles right for me. 'Fuck you' I thought and stood my ground, a thought about what I was doing still not getting anywhere near entering my head. The little cunt swerves at the last moment, exposing a nice piece of sleeve to grab a hold off. Out goes hand, down goes ned with a satisfying heavy tumble. He's about a good 15-20 ft away from me once he stops skidding along the ground, expressing his fond admiration for my actions. He then throws the heavy chain he's also knicked at me, striking my side. The Asian guy has caught up with me, and realising that he's just thrown away a very heavy and deadly weapon to his foe, the wee cunt legs it.
The dude was well chuffed, both of us shaking, exchanging phone numbers. We part after bemoaning the state of the world, both shook up and both relieved that nothing was hurt.
I just had to write this down, trying to get my nerves back in order. And I'm feeling quite pleased with myself for doing the right thing.
MUTHAFUKIN NEDS FUCK WIT ME AN ILL RIP YOU A NEW ONE!!! -
richarddavies wrote:
It's more looking for a series of incidents where you pulled off a massive fluke and somehow managed to capitalise on it. More tongue in cheek Roger Moore style than actually thwarting a nuclear attack by terrorists and saving a hot girl at the same time. That said Khanivor has just won the thread.
well i don't think your gonna find many examples of people vag bashing an international supervillains hussy , shooting the fella in the face, then quippin about it. Well i haven't done that much lately. -
Drakesmoke 896 posts
Seen 6 days ago
Registered 7 years agoOnce, I got charged by a cow. Knocked it clean out, one punch. Thing is I had to leg it as its mates saw what was going on, and no word of a lie they all stood up on their hind legs and started firing milk at me from their tits. -
TheMayorOfJugs 6,489 posts
Seen 3 years ago
Registered 8 years agoNot even sure if actual cows or hormonal women. -
Sorry this was supposed to be posted in tropes vs women.
Sometimes posts may contain links to online retail stores. If you click on one and make a purchase we may receive a small commission. For more information, go here.
