Today I learned ... women are disgusting/pragmatic* creatures Page 2

  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 12:30:45
    This is one seriously crap thread!
  • elstoof 9 Feb 2017 12:39:16 28,125 posts
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    Those dudes on Reddit know how to party
  • Ddanno 9 Feb 2017 13:34:20 1,888 posts
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    Why in fuck's unholy name did I click on this
  • Salaman 9 Feb 2017 14:51:11 24,162 posts
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    God, I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to find that thread again on Reddit. I'll have a look at home, as it requires putting things in the search box that I prefer not to put in there at work.
  • twelveways 9 Feb 2017 16:14:04 7,131 posts
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    I'd do it if i had constipation (and a fanny).
  • Pipedream 9 Feb 2017 16:31:35 658 posts
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    An ex who was a nurse told me about a patient who's room began smelling of poo. every day the whiff got stronger and they couldn't figure out why.

    The patient was having huge turds which wouldn't flush. In her mind it was less embarrassing to fold them up in paper and hide them in the cupboard. Women are weird with poo.
  • mothercruncher 9 Feb 2017 17:25:11 19,474 posts
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    This is horrendous and I wish I could wind the clock back to pre-thread.
    I wonder if I get incredibly drunk now I can avoid this short term memory becoming a long term one?
  • Dougs 9 Feb 2017 17:36:19 100,414 posts
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    Ddanno wrote:
    Why in fuck's unholy name did I click on this
    Yeah, this.
  • Tryhard 9 Feb 2017 17:40:12 12,014 posts
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    My penis is thumb shaped, it explains everything.
  • HairyArse 9 Feb 2017 17:56:16 1,476 posts
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    I'm going to guess it's because women don't/won't poo daily like us men. We're not ashamed of it.

    My ex regularly goes 7-10 days without shitting. It's no wonder they're like WW2 underwater mines when she does eventually go. Nor is it a surprise she's regularly bloated, has stomach cramps and is constipated.
  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 17:57:52
    Pipedream wrote:
    An ex who was a nurse told me about a patient who's room began smelling of poo. every day the whiff got stronger and they couldn't figure out why.

    The patient was having huge turds which wouldn't flush. In her mind it was less embarrassing to fold them up in paper and hide them in the cupboard. Women are weird with poo.
    Woman are weird, she should have used clingfilm like us blokes.
  • twelveways 9 Feb 2017 18:02:01 7,131 posts
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    -HairyArse wrote:
    I'm going to guess it's because women don't/won't poo daily like us men. We're not ashamed of it.

    My ex regularly goes 7-10 days without shitting. It's no wonder they're like WW2 underwater mines when she does eventually go. Nor is it a surprise she's regularly bloated, has stomach cramps and is constipated.
    That's definitely not normal. Women I know well all poo daily
  • Rodderz 9 Feb 2017 18:02:30 4,497 posts
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    Salaman wrote:
    Then one guy posted:
    I just sent some of these replies to my gf she sent back:
    "I do that!"
    which one?
    "putting my thumb up my vagina to push out a turd"
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_kKXvDaJIzQ
  • ChiefGB 9 Feb 2017 18:03:23 13,815 posts
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    tinfoil is better, I'm a bit shy at allowing people to see my doings.
  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 18:14:08
    Tin foil is good, means you can pop them in the oven like jacket potatoes.
  • elstoof 9 Feb 2017 18:17:57 28,125 posts
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    -HairyArse wrote:
    I'm going to guess it's because women don't/won't poo daily like us men. We're not ashamed of it.

    My ex regularly goes 7-10 days without shitting.
    Have you ever piled up 7-10 days worth of food and wondered how the fuck it all fits in there between dumps.

    Women definitely poo daily in my experience, what your ex does isn't standard practice and neither is being ashamed of it.

    Edited by elstoof at 18:18:30 09-02-2017
  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 18:26:38
    Guys I'm a bit bunged up so tried to see if this would work by putting my thumb up my urethra
  • TurkeyNeck 9 Feb 2017 18:36:41 162 posts
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    I've got a massive hard on reading through this thread.
  • elstoof 9 Feb 2017 19:09:49 28,125 posts
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    PES_Fanboy wrote:
    Guys I'm a bit bunged up so tried to see if this would work by putting my thumb up my urethra
    Stealth my thumb is bigger that my penis
  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 19:12:45
    It's like a Chinese finger trap.
  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 19:17:46
    I just wanted to be like Rivuzu
  • Saul_Iscariot 9 Feb 2017 19:19:31 4,399 posts
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    PES_Fanboy wrote:
    Guys I'm a bit bunged up so tried to see if this would work by putting my thumb up my urethra
    You need to start with your little finger and, no pun intended, work your way up. Google some of Robert Mapplethorpe's photography. Please be warned, the pictures you are looking for are not suitable for work. Unless you work in a gay branch of the arts.

    Edited by Saul_Iscariot at 19:20:12 09-02-2017
  • macmurphy 9 Feb 2017 19:37:06 4,447 posts
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    elstoof wrote:
    -HairyArse wrote:
    I'm going to guess it's because women don't/won't poo daily like us men. We're not ashamed of it.

    My ex regularly goes 7-10 days without shitting.
    Have you ever piled up 7-10 days worth of food and wondered how the fuck it all fits in there between dumps.

    Women definitely poo daily in my experience, what your ex does isn't standard practice and neither is being ashamed of it.
    This. Two of my long term exes would regularly leave the door open and try and have a conversation with me while it sounded like they were chucking rocks down a well. One would even wait for me to walk in before doing the kind of concentrated pooh face you see on babies before unleashing a bar mine. I'd shake my head and she'd tell me I inspired her.

    Think I've been quite unlucky. Wouldn't mind dating a chick that locked the door and kept it to herself to be honest.
  • Deleted user 9 February 2017 19:45:43
    Saul_Iscariot wrote:
    PES_Fanboy wrote:
    Guys I'm a bit bunged up so tried to see if this would work by putting my thumb up my urethra
    You need to start with your little finger and, no pun intended, work your way up. Google some of Robert Mapplethorpe's photography. Please be warned, the pictures you are looking for are not suitable for work. Unless you work in a gay branch of the arts.
    It's such a pain uncoiling it all, I'm not going to muck it about again
  • mothercruncher 9 Feb 2017 20:12:06 19,474 posts
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