You're right, he probably would. Any and all conversations are basically placeholders which mean 'talk about X topic'. I'm doing them quickly as I know I'll change a lot of stuff later. I'm just trying to get the nuts and bolts down at the moment. It's far from perfect.
NaNoWriMo 2017 aka write ten pages then give up • Page 9
My final character introduction; Dean.
The structure I've gone with so far of switching between things that are happening to the four characters at more or less the same time is something I've stuck with (and I have another visit to each already written), but I adjusted the order slightly.
I've also, based off sunjumper's feedback, abstained from giving anyone a description. It wasn't entirely deliberate with Holly, but I'm now running with the idea of defining these people by their histories and actions, and leaving appearance entirely to the imagination.
Edited by The12thMonkey at 18:40:39 07-11-2017
Edited by The12thMonkey at 18:45:07 07-11-2017
Another good intro. How are you going to chain all the characters together? Are they going to meet or are you looking at a wider narrative of different experiences?
There's a typo at the start 'netter', which rather suits the theme.
I'm planning some cross over between them, but it's a little unclear to me exactly how. I have some ideas, but nothing fully formed, yet. Hope that by the time I get to those sections I will have figured something out.
Feedback: the description of the drive is excellent. I like how the sun coming out is some indicator of him crossing over into, I guess, some kind of hidden part of reality? It's like Shangri-la.
Maybe you can write each character's story thread separately and then see where the cross over, if any, lies? Perhaps the cross over lies in events rather than experience of personal interaction. Someone escaping something might mean that another will suffer. Anyway, I like your story, think it's going well and want to know a lot more.
As for my story it's actually almost entirely based in reality. I haven't yet introduced the magical realism element but will do soon. It might even be turning into a kind of horror story.
Reached 10k words, 1.5k off the daily pace so far. Here's a page where I've posted the entire story from the start up to current progress.
And I'm back on the board, getting back into the action
FogHeart 1,249 posts
Seen 4 hours ago
Registered 10 years ago
Here's my next part:-
@rice_sandwich day 4&5, to start with OI! You manage to make the north sound like a sort of medieval wasteland!
“Oh yeah, up north? I haven’t been up there for years.”
“I went up a few months ago. I took Amanda to show her the sights. She loves castles.”
Regional sensibilities aside, you nailed the description of my shed then set up some really good back story.
The stuff about the pregnancy was a little jarring, but you are establishing a load of characters I want to know much more about.
The pregnancy stuff needs a lot of work. It's definitely jarring. Like I said before, I'm often just saying 'this is a thing' and will probably change it later on. Going to the Highlands can be really nice but sometimes it's like going to Mordor.
I'll read your latest stuff on the way to work this morning.
Well, that was an unexpected turn of events and a decent chunk of story delivered. All good stuff that builds their world and develops the characters. Granny seems to the most developed so far. I thought that the group should have been much more scared during the face off, at least the boy. I get the impression that Granny has seen it all before. As before, eager to read more.
That last episode of Blue Planet 2 really stole your thunder! I like all the underwater and polar exploration details. I guess you need to walk the line between too much scientific detail that some people may find dry and risking confusion on the other hand with not enough detail. I like all that stuff so I prefer it over pseudo-science magic.
I'm going to read everyone's stuff from the start to get a better sense of the narrative as reading in small chunks breaks up the flow somewhat. But we've got a good crop of entries on the go this year.
Day 8. The intro of a new and very significant character. I'm not sure where it fits yet.
I dunno about that. I could bash out three or four 10 to 15k stories quite easily in a month. Writing intros and the beginning of stuff, necessary exposition etc. is really easy. The hard work begins when story threads cross and you run out of ideas but still need to keep going. Even 50k words is only about half of a novel.
SpaceMonkey77 wrote:Big floppy donkey dick.
I have some other things of creative import to write, besides.
Edited by Skirlasvoud at 16:14:59 08-11-2017
Princess in a Transit
Excellent chapter title, I was invested right from the start with that. I don't know why, because now that I think about it, the similarities are scant, but I started getting Iain M Banks' Excession vibes from the Haemorrhages. It felt to me like the rifts are potentially doors - maybe one way doors, but not quite as final as they initially seem.
Granny Plum is a bit of a boss, isn't she? Looking forward to seeing where this goes.
Pumping it out today and seeing how much sticks. Back to the hotel.
I'm in catch-up mode so it might not be pretty but it is all word count!
@FogHeart Nice detailing; I like the fruit tea descriptions. I might be the only person not watching Blue Planet 2, but the descriptions were evocative - especially the bit about the icebergs.
Did 4000 words today \o/
I'm lagging by 5000...
Not going to sweat it though. I'll have some free time tomorrow and I'm going to spend it on reading other people's work.
@FogHeart Going to ice - I liked how you juxtaposed the science chat with a commentary on herbal tea bags at the start!
Then it was good to get out "to the ice", kept the story moving at a nice pace. I liked the comradery between Matthew and his crew. But then I remembered that we know what happens to them and got sad. Good stuff!
@The12thMonkey I'm on Alice - very much like how you don't spell out the difficult predicament she is in but very much allude to it. Not sure quite how you do it, but I feel like I'm with / know your characters in a very short space of writing. More please.
Back 'round to Anthony.
I've managed to get myself about 300 ahead of target word count, and I have tomorrow off with some good ideas on how to proceed, so I'm planning to get a big way towards 20k. I'll read the others tomorrow and feedback then.
sunjumper 3,378 posts
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Registered 16 years ago
I regret that I have no feedback today and won't have time for it tomorrow either but Friday should be better on that front.
At least I got to write again and add the first part of chapter 1 to the blog. Who needs sleep anyway... right?
The story kind of derailed into its own very strange territory. I hope you enjoy it.
Hey, now the story is going somewhere. You've got a good flow and rhythm to the descriptions and dialogue. Good ways of connecting between scenes and character pov. Nothing stands out as being awkward. It looks like the more or longer you write, the better it gets. Throwing it all on the wall might even be a good approach.
I imagine we're going to head off in search of the princess and find out more about London. I get the impression that Granny is basically Han Solo.
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