The all new Official Christmas Thread Page 14

  • RyanDS 26 Dec 2018 21:53:58 12,547 posts
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    As a grinch. Thank god I get back to work tomorrow. New place, still trying to meet people. I am just looking forward to being a bit social again
  • Lukus 26 Dec 2018 21:56:53 21,644 posts
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    I'm at my parents house with my brother, who's a massive cunt that sucks the joy out of everything. I honestly can't wait to go home tomorrow and not have to do this again for another year.
  • Frogofdoom 26 Dec 2018 21:58:42 11,706 posts
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    Smother him with a pillow, next Christmas will be much nicer if you get it done now.
  • Lukus 26 Dec 2018 22:03:36 21,644 posts
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    You don't know how appealing that idea is. I think everyone else would actually applaud me rather than call 999.
  • elstoof 26 Dec 2018 22:03:43 22,446 posts
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    They serve turkey at belmarsh
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 22:07:01 17,923 posts
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    challenge_hanukkah wrote:
    I really miss smoking.
    I've been quit for 8 years now but have recently discovered I can have them when I'm pissed and feel no cravings for them when I sober. I can see no down sides to this moving forward.
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 22:09:24 4,699 posts
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    Maybe the cigarette smell will cover up your secret piss tree shame
  • JamboWayOh 26 Dec 2018 22:31:31 11,267 posts
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    Sounds like something from Take a Break magazine.

    'My secret piss tree shame: user Decks tells his story of pissing on the Christmas tree as retaliation for his gf not giving him the business'
  • RyanDS 26 Dec 2018 22:35:33 12,547 posts
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    Decks wrote:
    challenge_hanukkah wrote:
    I really miss smoking.
    I've been quit for 8 years now but have recently discovered I can have them when I'm pissed and feel no cravings for them when I sober. I can see no down sides to this moving forward.
    Now just find alcoholism and never need to stop smoking again
  • Dougs 26 Dec 2018 22:39:56 88,017 posts
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    fontgeeksogood wrote:
    You fools, this is the best bit. All the Christmas family shit is done
    For some. :-/ it's taking its toll a bit tbh.
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 22:45:52 4,699 posts
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    So, my boiler broke on the 23rd and I'm waiting for a part. We have got log burners / fires in most of the main rooms and it isn't TOO cold yet but no hot water meant the in-laws didn't hang around.

    Top tip for anyone still suffering. Just turn it off and pretend it's fucked
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 22:46:25 17,923 posts
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    The 2 espresso martini I had at my parents at 6pm means I'm not falling asleep watching anything for the foreseeable. I'm watching Gremlins for the first time in maybe 20 years. It's so fucking odd, they could never pull this kind of shit these days. It's brilliantly shit.
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 22:48:53 4,699 posts
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    Gremlins really is horse shit from start to finish. Although I haven't been able to finish it since the 80s ended. Not sure about the brilliance
  • elstoof 26 Dec 2018 22:51:52 22,446 posts
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    I tried about a month ago, didnít get beyond the dog in the bank scene
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 22:55:07 17,923 posts
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    Nostalgia is getting me through it but I really am surprised as to just how bad it is.
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 22:56:43 4,699 posts
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    Gizmo is genuinely the best actor in the whole thing
  • elstoof 26 Dec 2018 22:58:14 22,446 posts
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    Itís even worse than Goonies
  • JamboWayOh 26 Dec 2018 23:00:39 11,267 posts
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    elstoof wrote:
    Itís even worse than Goonies
    Iíll not hear anyone say a bad word about the Goonies. Iíll fight you I will.
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 23:05:47 17,923 posts
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    I've watched Goonies a few times recently and it still holds up as a very good kids movie.
  • elstoof 26 Dec 2018 23:06:08 22,446 posts
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    Itís pish
  • Rogueywon Most Generous Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 23:06:59 5,032 posts
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    Christmas was... odd here.

    I was hosting, for basically... well... the first time ever. This had some benefits. Last year, up at the parents' place, we had the "comedy racist neighbours". Just what you need for a bit of festive cheer. None of that this year.

    Plus, I was doing the cooking. A goose, a duck, some potatoes cooked in the goose fat and other assorted winter veg. Very nice stuff. Came out perfectly well.

    What didn't go so well was the broadband dying at noon. Not a big deal for me, I was busy cooking. But the sheer level of bitching from assorted guests got pretty epic. So I ended up cooking with one arm while my other held the phone to Virgin Media tech support. For most of the afternoon. It didn't come back that day. It came back around 1PM today. Fuckers. You'd have thought people would let it slide on Christmas day, but ooooooh no.

    Ah well, could have been worse. Best thing with hosting is no multi-hour journey back afterwards.
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 23:09:06 4,699 posts
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    Gizmo is the Benedict Arnold of the Mogwai
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 23:11:08 17,923 posts
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    Gremlins is picking up. The Christmas carol/old woman on the stair lift is still a great scene. Also Mike from Breaking Bad is one of the policemen.
  • Rogueywon Most Generous Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 23:11:11 5,032 posts
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    Also, one of the guests - and I am 99% sure it was my dad - committed an act of bio-terrorism in the en-suite bathroom.
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 23:14:24 4,699 posts
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    How did you know? Was it because he wrote "This is for the WiFi being fucked - dad" on the wall in his own shit
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 23:14:28 17,923 posts
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    Why is Phoebe Cates serving them at the bar?
  • elstoof 26 Dec 2018 23:18:11 22,446 posts
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    Has no one in your family got a 4G plan
  • Rogueywon Most Generous Forumite, 2016 26 Dec 2018 23:19:21 5,032 posts
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    @elstoof Yes.

    Not good enough, apparently.

    Fuckers.
  • Dgzter 26 Dec 2018 23:21:22 2,560 posts
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    Wait wait wait, the dad in Gremlins shat all over Rogueyís bathroom?
  • fontgeeksogood 26 Dec 2018 23:23:17 4,699 posts
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    Decks wrote:
    Why is Phoebe Cates serving them at the bar?
    For those interested, leggy brunette Phoebe Cates does not show her blabs in this movie
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