Following Divorce Page 3

  • Khanivor 11 Jul 2019 15:06:58 44,740 posts
    Seen 2 hours ago
    Registered 19 years ago
    Steifybobbins wrote:
    @dominalien that's one of the more sanitary examples so as not to upset anyones day
    As I’m sure you’re aware through your own reading, a lot of the time kids who’ve been alienated from a parent will come around. They’ll see the subside, controlling parent fir the selfish destructive force that they are and come to the victim parent over time.

    Sadly, this usually means missing out on the childhood part of life, for both parties.

    I hope your kids realize what’s going on sooner rather than later. I think there’s literally no greater evil in this world than depriving children of their parents and vice versa, (I view sexual abuse as the result of a mental sickness and not something done to intentionally cause harm)
  • Steifybobbins 11 Jul 2019 17:50:30 803 posts
    Seen 2 weeks ago
    Registered 13 years ago
    This is pretty much what I have read or been given as advice and I've begun to accept it. I just hope time does tell as you say
  • ChocNut 13 Jul 2019 06:21:36 2,471 posts
    Seen 2 years ago
    Registered 18 years ago
    Thanks all - we had some positive progress but it’s still unclear. Then yesterday afternoon my daughter split her head open at creche.

    It looked serious when I arrived (thankfully it happened within a minute of when I came home from work). My wife and I drove to the creche together. At first I thought she had brain damage because her speech was slurred (she’s 3 but usually speaks well) so we called an ambulance and thank God she came around in the car.

    We’re back at home now but the three of us heading back to the hospital in a few minutes so she can go under general anesthetic and get stitches.

    She’ll have a cool scar through her eyebrow. I know this probably sounds a bit dramatic but I haven’t much opportunity to edit and I’m on my phone but this is actually what’s going on at the moment.
  • ChocNut 13 Jul 2019 06:25:29 2,471 posts
    Seen 2 years ago
    Registered 18 years ago
    We drove her part way to the hospital and the ambulance met us half way.

    Wish us luck today! Thanks again for all the helpful divorce feedback. Hopefully we can figure this shit out. Oddly the situation with my daughter has helped things but we’ll see.

    I’m a bit distracted until my daughters stitched up. Have a good one all.
  • Dirtbox 13 Jul 2019 06:32:36 92,420 posts
    Seen 8 hours ago
    Registered 19 years ago
    Is killing it uncouth now?
  • Deleted user 13 July 2019 07:14:26
    Glad your daughter is sounding like she will be okay and glad talking is helping.

    In all the woe is me, I forgot about a book that might help (might not obviously). It’s called “the five love languages” by Gary Chapman. The book suggests that we all have a love language (e.g. personal time, gift giving, words of affirmation, acts of kindness and... something else I can’t remember). Anyway, theory is that we all have a way of expecting love to be shown and if you don’t speak the same one then you can be leaving each other wanting. Eg you could be the type who does lots for your wife to show your love, but she could be the type who feels loved when you spend quality time with her or when you say you love her or when you give her gifts.

    Sounds out there, but lots of people really rate the idea and it taught me that my wife needs me to shut up and listen to her more than she needs me to decorate a room. It also showed her that I’m the “doing “ type, so me cleaning up and fixing things was / is my way of saying I care.

    Anyway, just something else to think about as a possible reason for why we drift apart. I got it on audible which made it an easier listen, but you could find a précis online no doubt.

    Right, enough drivel from me, the cats want feeding and their looks suggest I could be breakfast soon if I don’t put down my phone.

    Again, glad your daughter is sounding better.
  • CowsMakeNoise 13 Jul 2019 11:26:10 180 posts
    Seen 11 hours ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    Iwasexclusive wrote:
    Monogamy is unnatural. There are many fields that need to be ploughed.
    And revolting farming practices like this are why I no longer eat vegetables. Keep it in your pants, Farmer Palmer.
  • G0atApocalypse 5 Jun 2021 16:46:23 53 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    +1 for the divorce crew.

    Moving out on Monday. Telling the kids (7 and 5) today.

    All amicable with their mum, we've agreed childcare and how we split finances. Almost going too well to be true at this point.
  • addybV3 5 Jun 2021 16:54:25 331 posts
    Seen 18 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    Unusual names for kids.

    Shit jokes aside, sorry to hear that mate. Hope it all works out.
  • elstoof 5 Jun 2021 16:54:40 27,431 posts
    Seen 34 minutes ago
    Registered 16 years ago
    Is this the same goat apocalypse from the days of yore?
  • challenge_hanukkah 5 Jun 2021 16:59:29 14,205 posts
    Seen 2 hours ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    G0atApocalypse wrote:
    +1 for the divorce crew.

    Moving out on Monday. Telling the kids (7 and 5) today.

    All amicable with their mum, we've agreed childcare and how we split finances. Almost going too well to be true at this point.
    Welcome back.

    Sorry to hear about the divorce.
  • G0atApocalypse 5 Jun 2021 17:02:32 53 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    elstoof wrote:
    Is this the same goat apocalypse from the days of yore?
    Aye.
  • G0atApocalypse 5 Jun 2021 17:04:39 53 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    @challenge_hanukkah

    Cheers pal.

    For the best I reckon - we were making eachother miserable. Still care about eachother and want eachother to be happy, but recognised we can't be that person for eachother. Calling it a day before we both get too old to find someone else, and before we start to hate eachother, was the right call.

    For anyone struggling with divorce and splitting up, I'd strongly recommend a book called Conscious Uncoupling.
  • mrpon 5 Jun 2021 17:10:04 37,235 posts
    Seen 2 hours ago
    Registered 15 years ago
    Sounds like you still want eachother to be together.
  • G0atApocalypse 5 Jun 2021 18:08:07 53 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    @mrpon it's a strange thing to care about someone and not want to be with them for the rest of your days, for sure.
  • JamboWayOh 5 Jun 2021 18:21:41 24,317 posts
    Seen 4 minutes ago
    Registered 8 years ago
    @G0atApocalypse

    Shit, sorry to hear that Goat. Glad to have you back in the forum though.
  • G0atApocalypse 5 Jun 2021 18:23:47 53 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    @JamboWayOh thanks, bröther. All good here. Hope you are yours are well.
  • Fake_Blood 5 Jun 2021 18:29:34 10,948 posts
    Seen 1 hour ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    I don’t know how it is for you guys, but I’ve lost track of divorces and people changing jobs round these parts. People had time to contemplate life I guess?
  • JoeBlade 5 Jun 2021 18:45:09 6,135 posts
    Seen 41 minutes ago
    Registered 18 years ago
    @Fake_Blood Wait a minute, are you indirectly insinuating it could all be related to this place? :the scream emoji:

    But the best of luck to you, horny end of the world.
  • Fake_Blood 5 Jun 2021 19:53:25 10,948 posts
    Seen 1 hour ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    I meant here in Belgium.
  • Trafford 5 Jun 2021 20:28:00 9,274 posts
    Seen 57 minutes ago
    Registered 13 years ago
    I love stories from the Lowlands.

    But on to me, getting divorced was probably the best thing that ever happened in my life. I became a full blown alcoholic, shagged around loads and ended up in a seaside town living in recovery.
    It's all good man 🙏
  • G0atApocalypse 5 Jun 2021 21:42:43 53 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 7 months ago
    💪
  • Wayne 5 Jun 2021 22:05:11 3,630 posts
    Seen 3 hours ago
    Registered 15 years ago
    I went through a similar divorce, albeit without the kids.
  • arty 5 Jun 2021 23:05:23 855 posts
    Seen 4 hours ago
    Registered 16 years ago
    yeah that sounds great trafford, lol.
  • Trafford 6 Jun 2021 05:52:39 9,274 posts
    Seen 57 minutes ago
    Registered 13 years ago
    Could be worse arty, lol.
  • BreadBinLidHero 6 Jun 2021 06:18:41 10,660 posts
    Seen 8 hours ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    All the best Goat.
  • JoeBlade 6 Jun 2021 06:29:27 6,135 posts
    Seen 41 minutes ago
    Registered 18 years ago
    Fake_Blood wrote:
    I meant here in Belgium.
    Considering I'm Belgian as well that kind of makes it worse.

    That said, as I'm single and got a great job recently I'm happy to say none of that applies to me.
  • PickledShogun 6 Jun 2021 12:15:20 103 posts
    Seen 5 hours ago
    Registered 4 months ago
    Post deleted
  • PickledShogun 6 Jun 2021 12:35:40 103 posts
    Seen 5 hours ago
    Registered 4 months ago
    G0atApocalypse wrote:


    For the best I reckon - we were making eachother miserable. Still care about eachother and want eachother to be happy, but recognised we can't be that person for eachother. Calling it a day before we both get too old to find someone else, and before we start to hate eachother, was the right call.

    .
    This exactly the point the wife and I reached and so I totally understand where you're coming from.

    It's been a couple of years since we made the decision to separate, but where we're both at now in terms of happiness for all involved it's not a decision either of us regret. I still see the kids regularly and even go to [what is now] her house and have tea from time to time and we still all have Christmas together at the house. It all worked out in the end.
Sign in or register to reply

Sometimes posts may contain links to online retail stores. If you click on one and make a purchase we may receive a small commission. For more information, go here.