Rewrite a movie scene or ending where the characters behave realistically/intelligently

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  • Mola_Ram 13 Aug 2019 09:19:32 21,854 posts
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    There's been a little discussion in the film thread about characters doing stupid things in movies, and I thought it would be interesting to spin it off into its own thread.

    As the subject suggests... think of a scene from a movie where people behave stupidly. Then, rewrite it so they act smartly, and go on from there. Often the movie will just stop in a sort of "they considered going to the haunted house, but decided it wasn't a good idea, the end" kind of way, but other variations might be more interesting!

    Note: this isn't intended as an argument for/against idiotic characters and decision-making in movies. It's just for fun!
  • PazJohnMitch 13 Aug 2019 09:28:01 14,804 posts
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    Young girl doesnít runaway screaming. Doesnít get kidnapped. Hero is not required to rescue her. The end.
  • RyanDS 13 Aug 2019 09:34:56 12,933 posts
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    https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/OneDimensionalThinking
  • nickthegun 13 Aug 2019 09:38:26 79,422 posts
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    Hellboy 2:

    'This crown can control the golden army, an army that can be used to take over the world!'

    'Hmmm.... better fire it into space, then, rather than just leave it lying around the office'

    (Runtime: 24 minutes)

    **This can be levelled at any film featuring a deadly MacGruffin
  • drhickman1983 13 Aug 2019 10:00:17 6,167 posts
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    RyanDS wrote:
    https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/OneDimensionalThinking
    The thing is, as that page articulates itself, that kind of reaction *is* natural and realistic. It's not intelligent, but when people panic they do so in stupid ways.
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 13 Aug 2019 10:03:56 21,734 posts
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    They got a bigger boat.
  • RGeefe 13 Aug 2019 10:09:24 463 posts
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    Goldfinger slices Bond's knob off with a laser and watches him die, in line with his expectations
  • SnackPlissken 13 Aug 2019 10:09:37 1,368 posts
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    Big. She continues to have a relationship with the kid.

    Oh wait..
  • JamboWayOh 13 Aug 2019 10:15:30 15,983 posts
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    Any romantic comedy where the hero of the film is a low key stalker and ends up getting the girl, actually gets rejected, gets a restraining order put on him and eventually a court sentence.
  • drhickman1983 13 Aug 2019 11:58:29 6,167 posts
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    JamboWayOh wrote:
    Any romantic comedy where the hero of the film is a low key stalker and ends up getting the girl, actually gets rejected, gets a restraining order put on him and eventually a court sentence.
    John Hughes films would be quite different.
  • challenge_hanukkah 13 Aug 2019 11:58:43 11,693 posts
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    RGeefe wrote:
    Goldfinger slices Bond's knob off with a laser and watches him die, in line with his expectations
    "Do you expect me to talk, because I will you know."
  • Jono62 13 Aug 2019 12:07:43 23,075 posts
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    The family see ET and shoot him dead.
  • challenge_hanukkah 13 Aug 2019 12:11:31 11,693 posts
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    I'd pay to see that movie.
  • thelzdking 13 Aug 2019 12:14:07 9,694 posts
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    Post deleted
  • neilka 13 Aug 2019 12:14:37 22,871 posts
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    Jurassic Park but it's just two ill donkeys and a hen.
  • challenge_hanukkah 13 Aug 2019 12:17:04 11,693 posts
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    Predator, but the Predator is just an unusual weather phenomenon.
  • Khanivor 13 Aug 2019 12:25:07 44,206 posts
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    Didnít remove the restraining bolt because new droid said it was stopping playback of hot chick.

    Droids and boy spent remaining decades of their existence fixing moisture vaparators
  • challenge_hanukkah 13 Aug 2019 12:27:17 11,693 posts
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    The Definitive Guide to Moisture Farming by L. Skywalker
  • JamboWayOh 13 Aug 2019 12:34:09 15,983 posts
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    Coming to America. Eddie's Murphy character doesn't make it past immigration, is interrogated for 5 hours before deported back to his 'shithole' country.
  • Technoishmatt 13 Aug 2019 12:44:24 3,663 posts
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    Khanivor wrote:
    Didnít remove the restraining bolt because new droid said it was stopping playback of hot chick.

    Droids and boy spent remaining decades of their existence fixing moisture vaparators
    Except the stormtroopers would have killed the boy and taken the droid.
  • hedben2013 13 Aug 2019 13:17:40 1,270 posts
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    Saving Private Ryan. Military top brass realise that sending a group of soldiers on a PR mission to rescue one guy who happens to have a load of dead brothers is not an efficient strategy. Private Ryan is KIA the following week. It turns out that the men who would have been sent to save him instead tipped the balance of the war in their own units, leading to victory over the nazis several months earlier and saving thousands of lives. Hitler is captured alive and sees the error of his ways, and after years of rehabilitation and reparations he now tours schools and prisons warning against the dangers of fascism.
  • Mola_Ram 13 Aug 2019 13:21:44 21,854 posts
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    hedben2013 wrote:
    Saving Private Ryan. Military top brass realise that sending a group of soldiers on a PR mission to rescue one guy who happens to have a load of dead brothers is not an efficient strategy. Private Ryan is KIA the following week. It turns out that the men who would have been sent to save him instead tipped the balance of the war in their own units, leading to victory over the nazis several months earlier and saving thousands of lives. Hitler is captured alive and sees the error of his ways, and after years of rehabilitation and reparations he now tours schools and prisons warning against the dangers of fascism.
    /applause
  • Decks Best Forumite, 2016 13 Aug 2019 13:22:23 21,734 posts
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    Everything that happens in Prometheus happens differently.
  • JamboWayOh 13 Aug 2019 13:30:44 15,983 posts
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    Charlize Theron runs sideways.
  • Load_2.0 13 Aug 2019 14:35:12 30,324 posts
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    Sam Neil shows his junk at runtime 11.24.15 forcing the Lewis and Clark to turn around.

    Event Horizon crashes into Neptune.

    Sam Neil attends a sensitivity training course and goes on to create a better gravity drive.
  • drhickman1983 13 Aug 2019 14:41:23 6,167 posts
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    Passengers

    The lead woman gets creeped out that the lead man woke her up and sentenced her to death. He tries to emotionally manipulate her. Feeling lonely she gives up but hates him. She ends up trapped, literally, in an abusive relationship. Eventually snaps and stabs him. She kills herself from loneliness.
  • Duffking 13 Aug 2019 14:45:59 16,403 posts
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    Decks wrote:
    Everything that happens in Prometheus happens differently.
    And even better Alien Covenant never happens.
  • FWB 13 Aug 2019 15:33:51 56,224 posts
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    Frodo jumps on an eagle, flies to Mount Doom and drops the ring in. Job done.
  • Jono62 13 Aug 2019 16:11:05 23,075 posts
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    The Sixth Sense:

    Boy claims to see dead people and is sent to a psychiatric hospital
  • RawShark 13 Aug 2019 16:21:18 979 posts
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    Hellraiser:

    Uncle Frank fails to solve the puzzle box and throws it into a drawer. Ashpyxiwanks himself to death two weeks later.
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