Games you wish they'd make

    First Previous
  • nudistpete 14 Aug 2019 16:26:05 808 posts
    Seen 4 days ago
    Registered 2 years ago
    What games do you wish "they" would make, man?

    My wish is: Inside the Factory: the Game

    Each stage is set in a different factory.

    In each factory your character, Gregg Wallace, must display how amazed he is by each giant industrial machine - the player must waggle their joycons/joysticks feverishly to cause Gregg to build up his excitement level.

    That is followed by a rhythm game where Gregg has to repeat back what the person showing himself around the factory has said at an obnoxiously loud volume, enough to be heard over the clanking of industrial machinery - later levels are harder as Gregg has to shout even louder because the people showing him 'round the factory are foreign.

    Then come a series of mini-games where Gregg has to start some industrial process ensuring he doesn't break the machinery or incorrectly weigh his ingredients and cause a batch of 2400 digestive biscuits to have to be sent to landfill.

    You'd repeat all that for each factory, with additional factories available as DLC.
  • wuntyphyve 14 Aug 2019 16:29:07 12,429 posts
    Seen 29 minutes ago
    Registered 6 years ago
    Does the collectors edition ship with your own Gregg Wallace?
  • fontgeeksogood 14 Aug 2019 16:29:29 6,541 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 1 year ago
    Mrs Brown's Boys D'Videogame
  • 2dividedby0 14 Aug 2019 16:37:41 47 posts
    Seen 4 days ago
    Registered 6 months ago
    A simulator focused solely on Volvo cars, from the old classic's up to the present day models.
  • Graxlar_v3 14 Aug 2019 16:39:55 7,311 posts
    Seen 17 hours ago
    Registered 2 years ago
    dig faced knight adventure 3D
  • Graxlar_v3 14 Aug 2019 16:41:10 7,311 posts
    Seen 17 hours ago
    Registered 2 years ago
    wuntyphyve wrote:
    Does the collectors edition ship with your own Gregg Wallace?
    Yes, its a fleshlight version though
  • Rogueywon Most Generous Forumite, 2016 14 Aug 2019 16:44:41 6,159 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 14 years ago
    2dividedby0 wrote:
    A simulator focused solely on Volvo cars, from the old classic's up to the present day models.
    I think a better idea might be Audi Driver Simulator. It'd actually be a score-attack game, where you'd rack up combo points by:

    - Making sudden turns with no indication.
    - Tailgating on the motorway while flashing your headlights.
    - Yelling abuse and making obscene gestures at people on pedestrian crossings.
    - Honking your horn repeatedly for no reason while stuck in traffic.
    - Playing shit music at aggressively loud volumes.

    Between missions, you'd spend your accumulated points on car upgrades, such as alloy hubcaps, or on customising your avatar with more than 500 varieties of denim jeans to choose from.
  • wuntyphyve 14 Aug 2019 16:46:56 12,429 posts
    Seen 29 minutes ago
    Registered 6 years ago
    Graxlar_v3 wrote:
    wuntyphyve wrote:
    Does the collectors edition ship with your own Gregg Wallace?
    Yes, its a fleshlight version though
    Which could double up as an icing dispenser.

    I say icing...

    Edited by wuntyphyve at 16:47:19 14-08-2019
  • fontgeeksogood 14 Aug 2019 16:47:57 6,541 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 1 year ago
    How about a game based on lazy stereotypes formed solely from Top Gear.

    Waggle stick for James to make a face
  • adamasunder12 14 Aug 2019 16:52:56 464 posts
    Seen 23 minutes ago
    Registered 3 months ago
    Alan Partridge simulator
  • wuntyphyve 14 Aug 2019 17:00:05 12,429 posts
    Seen 29 minutes ago
    Registered 6 years ago
    adamasunder12 wrote:
    Alan Partridge simulator
    Level one is how to drive 30pmh or less in a 30mph zone. If you hit 36mph it's game over as you cannot film the new series.
  • Jono62 14 Aug 2019 17:05:52 22,599 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 11 years ago
    Token:

    You play a black man who is surrounded by white people who do crazy shit like arson and you have to try stop the Police from framing and killing you
  • challenge_hanukkah 14 Aug 2019 17:09:57 11,044 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 6 years ago
    Squat Toilet Bullseye
  • nudistpete 14 Aug 2019 17:10:06 808 posts
    Seen 4 days ago
    Registered 2 years ago
    2dividedby0 wrote:
    A simulator focused solely on Volvo cars, from the old classic's up to the present day models.
    Nostalgia of Ford Racing on Xbox intensifies.

    I'd love a game where I get to race a mahoosive Volvo estate
  • Jono62 14 Aug 2019 17:12:03 22,599 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 11 years ago
    Milkers:

    You walk around an open world looking at and rating milkers
  • adamasunder12 14 Aug 2019 17:13:42 464 posts
    Seen 23 minutes ago
    Registered 3 months ago
    wuntyphyve wrote:
    adamasunder12 wrote:
    Alan Partridge simulator
    Level one is how to drive 30pmh or less in a 30mph zone. If you hit 36mph it's game over as you cannot film the new series.
    Funnily enough this is what made me think of it.
  • Graxlar_v3 14 Aug 2019 17:18:18 7,311 posts
    Seen 17 hours ago
    Registered 2 years ago
    Swatters -

    an 8 man multiplayer game where you call the police with a lie about your competitors having a gun and pointing at a baby or something in a hope to get them murdered whilst on camera.

    The winner, is the last one standing.
  • minky-kong 14 Aug 2019 17:24:37 14,322 posts
    Seen 7 hours ago
    Registered 11 years ago
    wuntyphyve wrote:
    adamasunder12 wrote:
    Alan Partridge simulator
    Level one is how to drive 30pmh or less in a 30mph zone. If you hit 36mph it's game over as you cannot film the new series.
    "He's not a criminal, but he will go 80mph on the motorway if he wants to get somewhere quickly"
  • adamasunder12 14 Aug 2019 17:40:13 464 posts
    Seen 23 minutes ago
    Registered 3 months ago
    Brilliant :D
  • DangerousDave_87 14 Aug 2019 17:45:45 6,245 posts
    Seen 9 hours ago
    Registered 3 years ago
    A modern Destruction Derby with the announcer and track layouts of the original.

    Oh wait. I'm not getting the rules here...

    Edited by DangerousDave_87 at 17:46:20 14-08-2019
  • Addy__ 14 Aug 2019 17:47:29 1,127 posts
    Seen 5 hours ago
    Registered 4 months ago
    DangerousDave_87 wrote:
    A modern Destruction Derby with the announcer and track layouts of the original.

    Oh wait. I'm not getting the rules here...
    Wreckfest is the best thing now.
  • adamasunder12 14 Aug 2019 17:55:56 464 posts
    Seen 23 minutes ago
    Registered 3 months ago
    Gym simulator. Bonus points for throwing the bar down as hard as possible.
  • richarddavies 14 Aug 2019 18:17:40 6,778 posts
    Seen 7 hours ago
    Registered 11 years ago
    A modern day, adult trial game. Where you can choose to be a prosecutor or defence attorney in cool cases like murder, drug offences and interfering with dogs.
  • simpleexplodingmaybe 14 Aug 2019 18:24:29 10,808 posts
    Seen 5 hours ago
    Registered 4 years ago
    Football Supporter

    Admin style game in the vein of Football Manager about the daily life of a football supporter. Booking away tickets, trying to get on SSN, ringing local phone-ins, arranging something tasty for when a rival firm comes to town, planning tifos for when things go well and negotiating the best price for bedsheets and spray paint for when they don't.

    A playground rumour persists that a cheatcode will let you streak.
  • nudistpete 14 Aug 2019 18:26:06 808 posts
    Seen 4 days ago
    Registered 2 years ago
    richarddavies wrote:
    A modern day, adult trial game. Where you can choose to be a prosecutor or defence attorney in cool cases like murder, drug offences and interfering with dogs.
    Phoenix Wright in Stoke-on-Trent, the game we've always wanted.
  • Rogueywon Most Generous Forumite, 2016 14 Aug 2019 18:38:11 6,159 posts
    Seen 6 hours ago
    Registered 14 years ago
    Cooking Forumite

    A spin-off from the popular "Cooking Mama" series, but with an EG forums twist. Go to the ends of the earth to collect the most exotic and authentic ingredients then turn them into something that looks like a dog just regurgitated it. Prepare a range of fine recipes, including:

    - Lumpy, unappetising brown mess.
    - Lumpy, unappetising grey mess.
    - Lumpy, unappetising pink mess.
    - Badly cooked lumps of meat with runny bits.
    - Twizzler du Turkey avec Diarrhea la Creme.

    Upgrade your kitchen with expensive utensils that give absolutely no improvement to how the food looks. A photo mode allows you to zoom right in on your creations and post photographs online to spread fear and dismay.
  • DrStrangelove 14 Aug 2019 18:48:01 14,373 posts
    Seen 2 hours ago
    Registered 10 years ago
    Steam sale simulator. Might actually save a lot of money
  • DrStrangelove 14 Aug 2019 18:49:41 14,373 posts
    Seen 2 hours ago
    Registered 10 years ago
    I'd also love any game developed by vizzini and Stefansen. It's going to be art.
  • richarddavies 14 Aug 2019 19:07:08 6,778 posts
    Seen 7 hours ago
    Registered 11 years ago
    If Stef did the soundtrack to any game I'd be first in line. Genius.
  • First Previous
Log in or register to reply

Sometimes posts may contain links to online retail stores. If you click on one and make a purchase we may receive a small commission. For more information, go here.