A list of things I have stuck my cock in Page 11

  • Oh-Bollox 28 Oct 2015 16:28:45 6,513 posts
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    @neilka A female friend has asked me, for science, to stick my cock in one of those and report back to her. Still have yet to find the opportunity.
  • Deleted user 28 October 2015 16:59:47
    I think David Cameron wins this thread.
  • Biggy316 28 Oct 2015 17:08:18 25,277 posts
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    I once doused my genitals in aftershave and set them on fire for a movie.
    I tried a vacuum blowy but they suck.
    Ba dum tish.
  • Ruckly 28 Oct 2015 17:25:26 1,066 posts
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    Hot water bottle. Slightly warm water, fold it double, chuck some lube in, fold it double and stick it between the matress and the hard frame of the bed. Kneel and pump to completion.

    Too much admin these days but when you're 14 and horny these things happen.
  • elstoof 28 Oct 2015 17:26:52 23,943 posts
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    Supposed to be an armband isn't it
  • Ruckly 28 Oct 2015 17:45:01 1,066 posts
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    Never had armbands. You tend to have learnt to swim without them by the time you get to fapping age. Every house has a hot water bottle though.
  • GoatApocalypse 28 Oct 2015 18:04:41 5,831 posts
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    Ruckly wrote:
    Hot water bottle. Slightly warm water, fold it double, chuck some lube in, fold it double and stick it between the matress and the hard frame of the bed. Kneel and pump to completion.

    Too much admin these days but when you're 14 and horny these things happen.
    Wow.

    Where there's a will(y), there's a way.
  • Deleted user 28 October 2015 18:06:01
    At one point we all had our dicks inside our mum. It may have even made contact with her vagina on your exit.
  • Deleted user 28 October 2015 18:47:57
    Where can I buy a discreet hot water bottle?
  • elstoof 28 Oct 2015 18:56:00 23,943 posts
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    Ruckly wrote:
    Never had armbands. You tend to have learnt to swim without them by the time you get to fapping age. Every house has a hot water bottle though.
    Most normal folk would feel a bit uneasy about making love to their family hot water bottle. Much better to go and buy some arm bands and keep them in the secret box with all the other items of grot
  • elstoof 28 Oct 2015 19:46:50 23,943 posts
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    It'll just be revan making up a load of shit, like the entire Nas back catalogue in vinyl format
  • Deleted user 28 October 2015 20:04:52
    Prophet Mohammed
    Jay-Z
    Someone else's artwork
  • Ruckly 29 Oct 2015 02:27:04 1,066 posts
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    @Errol

    From my ex.

    A muddler.

    A banana.

    Both with a condom.
  • Vortex808 29 Oct 2015 13:40:27 13,348 posts
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    eightbitboy wrote:
    Reading that list makes me feel like i've missed out all these years. My list only consists of 2
    Is one of them a flask?
  • Deleted user 29 October 2015 13:48:01
    eightbitboy wrote:
    Reading that list makes me feel like i've missed out all these years. My list only consists of 2
    Fun to sometimes have a wank with the other hand, amirite?
  • Juz 29 Oct 2015 13:49:04 3,330 posts
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    eightbitboy wrote:
    Vortex808 wrote:
    eightbitboy wrote:
    Reading that list makes me feel like i've missed out all these years. My list only consists of 2
    Is one of them a flask?
    Flask, don't even own one. If I did, putting coffee in it would be it's only use.
    You could store your extra apostrophes in there, too.
  • rockavitch 29 Oct 2015 13:51:31 1,125 posts
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    I got to page 4 and it stopped loading the pages for me but I refuse to believe no one has said "you mum" yet.
  • jaangus 29 Oct 2015 13:57:56 5,383 posts
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    @PES_Fanboy you beat me to it ;(
  • minky-kong 29 Oct 2015 14:09:57 14,368 posts
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    eightbitboy wrote:
    Vortex808 wrote:
    eightbitboy wrote:
    Reading that list makes me feel like i've missed out all these years. My list only consists of 2
    Is one of them a flask?
    Flask, don't even own one. If I did, putting coffee in it would be it's only use.
    Not even a sly chipolata?
  • Syrette 29 Oct 2015 14:19:38 50,306 posts
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    Wasn't there a thread entitled 'A list of things i have stuck in my cock' at one point?
  • kentmonkey 9 Nov 2015 07:16:21 23,110 posts
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    Does the original poster need to update this with "a PS4"?
  • Deleted user 18 November 2015 14:05:11
    No, you misunderstand. TSD stuck his penis into David Cameron, thus he won the thread.
  • Deleted user 18 November 2015 15:14:33
    Post deleted
  • Vortex808 18 Nov 2015 15:58:11 13,348 posts
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    Oh hello, did he try to deny it above?
  • the_milkybar_kid 18 Nov 2015 16:32:54 8,035 posts
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    I've never bothered to read this thread so /notsureifsatire, but how the hell did he get his knob in a milk bottle?
  • Deleted user 18 November 2015 16:40:44
    He flattened it down, put a piece of string on it and then tugged it erect, like a ship in a bottle
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